Despre mine

Gavriloaiei Sabina

Imi place sa vorbesc si sa ascult, imi place sa rad, imi place sa fiu inconjurata de oameni de calitate. Mu imi place sa fac lucruri care nu ma reprez...

Blogs Home » Personal » Personale » Fake it 'till you become it

Fake it 'till you become it

Mi-am deschis bloggul din curiozitate... apoi a devenit o pasiune... si apoi un obicei.

Articole Blog

01. Do we still read? - Jan 19, 2020 8:42:00 AM

In the end, I think that if we want to grow our communities, we have to invest in culture. So, when was the last time when you bought some culture?

PS: here is my 2019 list with favorite books
Photo creditThank you for your time! 😊
03. A sabbatical period - Jan 4, 2020 10:07:00 AM

Nowadays, I hear frequently about people who want to take a sabbatical period.It happens this probably because we are tired of the usual work and we want to reconnect with our passions. It is a good time to think about what you did until that moment and what are your expectations for the future. You can do volunteering work, you can learn new things or just travel.From the legal side, you can quit your job or take un unpaid holiday period.Try a reasonable period (maximum 1 year). When you came back to work for sure you will receive a lot of questions about what you did. It will be a challenge to adapt again to your work schedule.But also, when you came back to work, you will feel more relaxed and this is great for both of you (employee and employer).
If you want a sabbatical period, but you don't know what to do, you can find here some ideas.
I wish you all a beautiful, magical and happy new year!

Photo creditThank you for your time! 😊
04. Happy New Year! - Jan 1, 2020 1:27:00 PM

Thank you for your time! 😊
05. Ganduri ca de final de an - Dec 30, 2019 1:30:00 PM

06. 19 books which make my year - Dec 20, 2019 6:11:00 PM

07. Things to do as an employee - Dec 7, 2019 12:35:00 PM

Make a career planMake a habit of making new things (to be out of your comfort zone)Practice, practice and... you can try also to practiceTake time for professional networkingInvest in long-term objectivesLearn and read - always and everythingFind a mentorPay attention to your time management skillsShare your knowledgeDevelop healthy habits

Photo creditThank you for your time! 😊
08. The recruiter and the candidate. Love or hate? - Nov 23, 2019 12:12:00 PM

09. The Prisoner’s Dilemma - Nov 1, 2019 6:06:00 PM

The Prisoner’s Dilemma presents this scenario: Two suspects have been accused of a crime and they are now in separate rooms in a police station, with no communication possible with the other. The prosecutor has separately told them the following:If you confess and agree to testify against the other suspect, who does not confess, the punishment against you will be dropped and you will be free.If you do not confess but the other suspect does, you will be convicted and the the prosecution will seek the maximum sentence of three years.If both of you confess you will both be sentenced to five years in prison.If neither of you confesses you will both be accused and you will be sentenced to two years in prison.
What should the suspects do? The prisoner’s dilemma provides a framework for understanding how to strike a balance between cooperation and competition and is a useful tool for strategic decision-making.For example, in the real world, if two companies have an implicit agreement to keep the same salaries ranges in a given year, their costs may stay at relatively same levels. But if one defects and raises its budget, it may attract better employees than the other company. However, if both companies boost their budgets, they can attract similar profiles, but neither will be more efficient than the other.Or, think about a working task which has to be split between 2 employees. The best situation is when both of them are equally involved. If one of them doesn't involve, for sure he will save time and effort. But the other one will double his effort. If no one involves, they both loose.Unfortunately, if we know that we have to cooperate, we will easily feel better when the other looses. It will help us to be aware of every moment that we cannot have success without the team's success. For the team's success, we have to communicate and collaborate properly.

Photo creditThank you for your time! 😊
10. Why every recruitment process needs time? - Oct 18, 2019 6:09:00 PM

I am a recruiter and many candidates use to tell me ”instead of having a meeting, it would be easier to send me some JDs and I will decide if there is something which interests me”. I totally agree that everyone's time is very important. If you are ok with your job, you don't want to spend time in other recruitment processes. You feel that it is a waste of time to have an HR interview, then some technical tests or interviews, some meetings with the team or with the manager, or to see the office.But when you involve in some recruitment processes, there is a chance to find what new projects there are in the market and what are the newest technical requirements. Yes... being informed also needs time!
If you don't like to treated as one between many other specialists in the market, why do you treat a job or a company like one in many others?I use to say that nowadays recruitment processes there are some win-win processes. Both (the employee and the employer) can choose and both of them invest time.So, why every recruitment process needs time and more steps for you, as a candidate? Because in this way you will know if you fit with the company or with the team, if you would like your manager or if the project will allow you to grow.There is an experiment in Psychology that sais that we appreciate more the things for whom we work harder. It's not important if you work on IT or sales, if you are an HR or an engineer. If you don't take time to involve in a recruitment process, most probably you don't care about this choice. If you don't care about this choice, you are not allowed to complain about the job. That is the reason why some people are happy with their jobs and some aren't. And that is the reason why some specialists just choose a job and others choose a career.
In the end, I will propose an exercise – it is not important in what domain you work or what seniority you have. Think at the most wanted company in the market – that company where you really appreciate for their product, or for their specialist or clients. What makes you so special and it will convince them to hire you?When you will have the answer to this question, for sure you will treat with the maximum seriosity that recruitment process!

Photo creditThank you for your time! 😊
11. Self-Handicapping at Work - Oct 13, 2019 5:43:00 PM

Self-handicapping involves engaging in behaviors that sabotage your chances of success. Although we all want to feel good, sometimes we preffer to avoid taking responsibilities for our activity. The phenomenon was first described by researchers Stephen Berglas and Edward Jones in 1978.Do you remember when you were a student and you had to prepare for an exam? Do you remember that sometimes that was the most proper moment to start.... cleaning your room, instead of studying? Then, of course, it was the other¢s fault for your poor result J.When you find an outside source to blame for possible failures, it can be an effective strategy for protecting your self-esteem. But this has a significantly negative impact on success. It can lead to lower motivation and less incentive to try to succeed in the future.
To avoid this at work, ask yourself: “How am I growing professionally right now?” If you feel that is complicated to answer on this, then you can try to identify these behaviors:Avoiding AccountabilityLacking Self-AwarenessHaving Tunnel VisionLacking EngagementPoor Analysis and Decision MakingPoor CommunicationPoor Talent DevelopmentMicromanagingNot Driving for Results
This list is made by Phillip Decker and Jordan Mitchell. The good news is that inside the book Self-Handicapping Leadership , they guide on how to overcome them.

Photo creditThank you for your time! 😊
12. Are we right? - Sep 28, 2019 5:41:00 AM

13. Even if you took 10 at the exam... - Sep 14, 2019 4:25:00 PM

14. How to negotiate for a higher success - Aug 31, 2019 7:32:00 AM

15. Corporate Stockholm Syndrome - Aug 17, 2019 5:21:00 AM

Stockholm Syndrome refers to the psychological phenomenon observed in hostage situations where the hostages start to identify and sympathize with their captor. The captor controls the life source of the captive; also the punishment and the reward.Because work has a great impact in our lives, we are at risk for experiencing Corporate Stockholm Syndrome – a thing that happens when employees begin to identify with an employer who mistreats them (like bullying behaviors or just ignoring the emotional needs of the employee).Of course, there is a difference between being held captive in the workplace and being held captive in a real-life hostage scenario, but the employee experiencing Corporate Stockholm Syndrome displays a tendency to become emotionally attached to the company to the detriment of their emotional health. The employee will also rationalize the poor treatment as necessary for the good of the organization as a whole, and he will defend the employer’s actions.
Do you think that this is not possible? You didn’t have any friend who was complaining (several times) about his work and you asked him why he doesn’t change the job? And his answer was that is not so bad or he will not find something better than this. Well... this is a good start for this.Breaking the cycle is hard, but choosing to do nothing and hoping to outlast it is a frequent option. Very similar to other negative phenomena that can happen into the organizations, for an employee it is important to be aware of his state, to name it and to ask for help. We can feel that is not fair to leave a job or a team – it is not fair for them. On the other side, if we stay in that environment and we feel bad, it is not fair for us. Can you live with this?

Photo creditThank you for your time! 😊
16. Be welcomed! - Aug 3, 2019 10:06:00 AM

17. How do we choose... our manager? - Jul 26, 2019 6:33:00 PM
We usually talk about how do we choose our job – especially the first one. We hear a lot that we have to assess carefully the job description or the company¢s brand.But we are prepared to choose also our manager?We are not anymore in the moment when only the HR and the hiring manager asks for recommendations. The candidate also can ask for information from the market for the company or the manager.For my point of view, there are some things make a manager a significant one for your career:it lets you to make mistakes and it helps you to learn from themit anticipates your movements / possible difficult situationsit is aware of your needs and it does steps to reach themit takes some risks with youit knows your potentialit sustains your development needsit is not afraid that you will grow too much
In the end, a classic speech on leadership.

Photo creditThank you for your time! 😊
18. The power of a second place - Jul 20, 2019 5:47:00 AM

19. How should I work as HR? - Jul 13, 2019 1:13:00 PM

Being an HR is not like a job for whom you dream or prepare since you were a kid. I don¢t know any child who says ”when I will group I want to be an HR” and maybe there are still some parents of us who use to say ”Personnel department” instead of ”HR department”.So let's start with the beginning.How do you prepare for an HR career? You can graduate a faculty, you can take some training on this or you can take training on the job.In Iasi, there are 3 faculties where you can study for HR – Psychology, Economics, and Philosophy. Each of them has its advantages and expertise in some area.As training, you cand take a general one as HR manager or some particular ones – on the activity you will do (like recruitment, training, admin).The training on the job works better for somebody who knows already the activity from the company and it just changes the department.

What does HR? You can work as an HR in a company or in consultancy.(Some of) The domains where you can work are:RecruitmentCompensations and benefitsTraining and organizational developmentPerformance managementPersonnel managementPayrollInternal communicationEmployer brandingReportingHR Management

Being an HR is not an easy or a difficult job. But behind the technical skills you need, maybe the most difficult part of this role are the soft skills – things regarding work ethics, social interactions, and data-driven decisions.Some referrals to understand better the basics of HR: 1 , 2 , 3 , 4 or 5

Photo creditThank you for your time! 😊
20. What about Bullying? - Jul 6, 2019 7:58:00 AM

Do you have any colleague who use to tease you or sabotage you? Well... this is a ”good” start for bullying.Behind every bullying behavior, we can see a lot of implications for an employee: a stressful environment, a decline of performance or commitment to the organization, a decrease of work effort or work quality, maybe quitting the job. Because of this, the costs of workplace bullying are high for both employees and employers.From both sides, there has to be done some things.As an employee, you can:Acknowledge that there is a problem. Have you seen ”the elephant from the room” ? Name it! Bullies can make you feel as it¢s your fault or you just exaggerate. By giving it a name, you can remind yourself that it is a real problem and you are not to blame.Document the behavior. About the future steps you may take, it is important to count all the toxic workplace behaviors. It helps to have specific examples to support your claims. This can serve as a reminder that the abuse is more than just a feeling.Focus on healing and support. Because your health and well-being are the priority, it is important to check the ways in which bullying is affecting your mental and physical health. If you find you are suffering, seek help from specialists.Strategy and actions. Take time to search company policies and a legal framework to support this situation. Based on this, you can plan some actions and you can involve the management team from the company, the HR or the Legal advisor.Follow-up. What happened after your complain? If nothing happened, it is not anymore your responsibility to change something in the company¢s culture. For you, it is important to make decisions that are best for your well-being.
As an employer, you can not be aware of what is happing daily in your teams. To ensure a healthy work environment, you can:Review available internal policies. Examine if your employees know what they have to do when they are the victims of some bullying behaviors. To whom they have to address? Or what measures you have to take when you receive a complaint?Open a dialogue with current employees. Are they satisfied with their work? Are you ok with your turnover rate? Create a safe, open space where employees can discuss their concerns and wants. This can be in the form of anonymous surveys, individual discussions, or both. Be sure to listen to and seriously consider the information your employees share with you.Take action. After reviewing data, policies, and interviews, you may have conflicting or unclear information. You may receive complaints about individuals whom you considered your best employees or find that your mission and values as an organization are not being upheld in practice. Leaders within the organization must discuss these findings and determine what specifically needs to change, whether it is different hiring practices, improved policies for employee conflict, or a stronger adherence to the beliefs of the organization.
It is not is easy to confront bullying because is meant to address any toxic behaviors that had been allowed or even encouraged up until that point. While this could require large changes, creating a healthy workplace culture and having policies in place to support all employees is a smart business decision. This investment on the front end can save losses in turnover, work productivity, and even lives.

Photo creditThank you for your time! 😊
21. About a national culture - Jun 29, 2019 9:46:00 AM

When I was a student, I found about an author who proposed a theory with 6 cultural dimensions which can be assessed for each country. Geert Hofstede is the author's name and his model describes a society based on the values of its members.Based on a lot of research on this area, the theory grew and the nowadays model is as it follows:Power distance - the extent to which the less powerful members of organizations and institutions accept and expect that power is distributed unequally. A higher degree of this indicates that hierarchy is clearly established and executed in society. A lower degree of this index signifies that people question authority and attempt to distribute power.Individualism vs. Collectivism - the degree to which people in a society are integrated into groups. Individualistic societies have loose ties that often only relate an individual to his/her immediate family. They emphasize the “I” versus the “we.” The collectivism describes a society in which tightly-integrated relationships tie extended families and others into in-groups.Uncertainty avoidance - a society's tolerance for ambiguity, in which people embrace or avert an event of something unexpected, unknown, or away from the status quo. Societies that score a high degree in this index opt for stiff codes of behavior, guidelines, laws, and generally rely on absolute truth, or the belief that one lone truth dictates everything and people know what it is. A lower degree in this index shows more acceptance of differing thoughts or ideas.Masculinity vs. Femininity - masculinity is defined as a preference in society for achievement, heroism, assertiveness and material rewards for success. Its counterpart represents a preference for cooperation, modesty, caring for the weak and quality of life. In feminine societies, they share modest and caring views equally with men. In more masculine societies, women are somewhat assertive and competitive, but notably less than men.Long-term orientation vs. short-term orientation - the connection of the past with the current and future actions/challenges. A lower degree of this index (short-term) indicates that traditions are honored and kept, while steadfastness is valued. Societies with a high degree in this index (long-term) view adaptation and circumstantial, pragmatic problem-solving as a necessity.Indulgence vs. restraint - the degree of freedom that societal norms give to citizens in fulfilling their human desires. Indulgence is defined as a society that allows relatively free gratification of basic and natural human desires related to enjoying life and having fun. Its counterpart is defined as a society that controls the gratification of needs and regulates it by means of strict social norms.
Curious about how is Romania accordingly to Hofstede's model?You can search on its website
Photo credit
Thank you for your time! 😊
22. I will be able to do it? - Jun 22, 2019 5:47:00 AM
Do you remember a very difficult moment, when there was a lot of pressure on you and you had the feeling that you can’t do more than this?We’ve been there. But there are some peoples that reshape themselves easier than the others (for eg., the sportsmen). One of the things that are different at them is resilience.That is the process of adapting well in the face of trauma, tragedy or significant sources of stress. It is crucial to high performance and it is a thing that doesn't happen by chance.When you're under pressure making the right choice is difficult. It requires your ability to identify the best course of action given your knowledge, understanding of the situation, past experience, and awareness of available resources.In most of the situations, we want to be resilient.If you’re not, you can build our resilience, like this:Think about what changes can appear and look for the benefits of them. Although it is a difficult moment and things weren’t how we did expect, the change is part of our life and it is easier to focus on the good things that came with the changeFind people who you can count on – you can easier face a difficult moment if you have the support of somebody close to you, somebody who can help you and somebody who won't criticize you.Focus on the future, not in the past. It is ok to analyze that stressful moment you have. It helps you to understand where you wrong in the past and what behaviors you have change for the future. To boost your resilience don’t stay locked in your past because you can’t change it.Re-analyze your goals – are them real ones? You are still available or interested to achieve them?Once you agreed with your goals, analyze what steps you have to do... and do them. A self-discipline of getting things done right helps you to avoid some difficult moment. Also, it helps you to see things in perspective.
I think that everybody has resilience. It’s just a matter of how much and how well you use it in your life.

Photo creditThank you for your time! 😊
23. Lessons learned from Brene Brown - Jun 8, 2019 4:00:00 PM

Open yourself up only to those people who have earned the right to hear your story.Be the adult you want your children to be.What other people think of you is none of your business.Nostalgia is a dangerous form of comparison.We judge others because we judge ourselves.You might have 1 million friends on facebook but that doesn’t mean that those people are really your friend.Practicing spirituality brings a sense of perspective, meaning and purpose to our lives.
*Dr. Brené Brown is a research professor at the University of Houston where she holds the Huffington Foundation – Brené Brown Endowed Chair at The Graduate College of Social Work.She has spent the past two decades studying courage, vulnerability, shame, and empathy and is the author of five #1 New York Times bestsellers: The Gifts of Imperfection, Daring Greatly, Rising Strong, Braving the Wilderness, and her latest book, Dare to Lead, which is the culmination of a seven-year study on courage and leadership.Brené’s TED talk – The Power of Vulnerability – is one of the top five most viewed TED talks in the world with over 35 million views. She is also the first researcher to have a filmed talk on Netflix. The Call to Courage special debuted on the streaming service on April 19, 2019.

Biography and photo creditThank you for your time! 😊
24. What Do You Want to Be When You Grow Up? - Jun 1, 2019 5:43:00 PM
Today is 1st June and we celebrate Children's Day. Because of this, I remember a question that followed me the entire childhood: ”What do you want to be when you grow up?”Thinking at this question, I made a list with some jobs I think that are popular with all-times children:Teacher. Many children consider their first teacher as an example for them. They enjoy to interact with other children, so they consider this job similar to playing games with other children.Police Officer. Children (especially boys) dream of becoming police officers because they fight against bad people and help citizens. They are impressed by their uniforms and all the accessories they were.Doctor or Veterinarian. Children want to help other people or to treat animals. If their interactions with the pediactricians are good, they will see this job as an easy and a nice one.Dancer or Musician. Many kids dream of being artists – performing on the stage, being popular and being validated by fans. For this, many parents sustain their children with ballet or piano classes.Athlete. Many children like sports. They have energy, enthusiasm and courage. They like competition, but also working with a team.
When you are on the other side – of a person who doesn't know what to do – you can do some simple steps: make a list of 5-10 jobs you know and organize the list (choosing the favorite ones)talk to a counselor and take some career tests (to assess with what you fit with)do some research and learn about the job – volunteering work and internships can be some options.
If you were a child, what job would you like to do?

Photo creditThank you for your time! 😊
25. Do we need data? - May 25, 2019 5:29:00 AM